Defining happiness

Happiness. What is happiness? Is there an objective way of defining it? A lot of gurus talk of 'true' happiness and 'momentary happiness' and eternal happiness and such whatnots. They usually talk of some absolute transcendental happiness that results from attaining some transcendental knowledge. It is a very lucrative proposition, actually: to put in a good deal of effort for only once and then attain the happiness that'll stay with you forever. Something that can never be taken away from you. Is such a thing possible? Maybe. Is it desirable? Probably.

A lot of discourse can be found on the topic of happiness (even more on the topic of suffering, I'll wager) in both oriental and occidental schools of thought. However, instead of examining them, I would like to put forward my personal opinion; the definition of happiness that holds true for me, and will probably hold true for others as well. I won't call this state of happiness transcendental, but it is long-term; and I hope I can make it permanent. And I certainly find it desirable.

From around the time when I was thirteen years old to about an year ago (a couple of years short of a decade), a particular idea has continually haunted my thoughts: 'if I could live my life all over again, I won't make the big mistakes I've made.I'll get the most out of my life. I'll make the most of all the opportunities I've squandered ...' and so on. I could actually count on my fingers all the things that I wanted to change. I also remember being continually angry at myself for not being good enough, not being able to make the most out of my life. It wasn't pessimism: I always believed that I can make things change by my effort; it was frustration at not achieving that change.

But now, there has been a significant change in my thought pattern. Now, the sentence that starts with 'if I could live my life all over again ...' , ends with ' I won't'. The simple reason is that now I like the person that I am. Sure, life is still far from what it should be. There is still much to achieve and I am aware that I have squandered much of my life away when I could have used all that time constructively. But I also know that I wouldn't have been the person that I am today, if I hadn't made the choices I made in my life ... good and bad.

This is my definition of happiness: if given a chance to live my life all over again, I can say no to it; if I can accept all my successes and failures with the same composure knowing that all of it made me the person I am today; I am a happy man. Moreover, I am a free man: free of the ghosts of my past to build a good future.